About the ban on oral sex - are we talking between unmarried people or married people? Or both? I knew the JWs went through some weird ban on particular sex acts back in the 80s, but I can't believe it would still be going on today. No way.
Ima Apostate
JoinedPosts by Ima Apostate
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20
The 2008 Grand Boasting Session Ahead
by WTWizard inwell, the time is almost here--already.
the first of the 2008 grand boasting sessions is almost upon us, and i expect to begin seeing threads about the programs in the coming weeks.
notably, this means some children will be missing the last weeks of school (the program starts on friday), or at least one day of it, to attend.. i will be looking for any new rules and instructions that have not yet happened.
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54
Finding Faith
by Ima Apostate inhow many of you ex-jw kids were able to believe in mainstream christianity after leaving the borg?
within the last year, i have opened up to getting to know god again.
what's funny is that when i prayed for truth and to know god, i knew and had a real feeling in my heart that i was getting closer to something real, but there was still a voice going, "hey, it's me jehovah, and you have rejected me!".
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Ima Apostate
Trevor,
I am quite young (27). You may misunderstand my experiences with the JW faith. It was never a faith that I sought out, researched, prayed on, reasoned about... It was shoved down my throat as a child. I believed it because everyone in my family did, and I trusted their judgment. Also, I had very limited exposure to people who believed differently.
When I got old enough to really begin developing the ability to think about these things for myself (13 or so), I began to have serious doubts about what I was taught. I did not 'cling to the faith' very long after that. I could never believe in the God of the Watchtower, who could kill all the terrific people who, at this very moment somewhere in the world, are on their knees begging for his help and praying to worship him in spirit in truth. (And the reason why he'd kill them - they had rejected the Witnesses who knocked on their door last Saturday.)
Over 14 years have gone by since I began to question what I believed, and only a year has gone by since I have begun to seek answers about what I really believed about God. I didn't start this post because I wanted to defend my newfound faith. In fact, I am constantly having to defend my faith from my own doubts. It certainly would be a lot easier to not believe in anything - it was for the 10 or so years that I did. But deep inside me, I will never stop believing in God, and never could. And in looking at the larger picture of history, the God of Israel makes sense to me.
Just because I don't believe in the creation story as it is spelled out in the Bible, well, it doesn't mean that I don't believe that something created mankind and has sought throughout time to bring creation into harmony with him (it, her, whatever you prefer). I even understand how God can be perceived as angry and jealous in the Old Testament. After all, it is a story of a God who continually forgives his people, and they continually screw up, and this goes on and on. But the fact that he keeps reconnecting with them tells me that he patient and loving. Then, if you were to believe as I do that Jesus in the New Testament is God's way of finally, once and for all, reconciling mankind to him... well, it makes sense enough for me.
Well, that's my view on Christianity as well as I can put it into words, which isn't very well right now because I'm sick with the flu. Please don't be too alarmed or apprehensive about my faith. I read the Bible regularly and constantly am reading other books on faith so that my faith is strengthened, and the only way to strengthen something is to test it to it's limits regularly. And believe me, my terrific 'worldly' friends love to badger me about what I believe on a regular basis. And I don't mind, because if I'm going to claim a belief as my own, I need to know to my very core that it is true and I'm not being delusional.
I get your point about 'cherry-picking' Bible verses which support your beliefs system, and I'm sure all Christians do that from time to time. After all, the Bible can be contradictory sometimes. And I'd love to discuss this with you, or someone, sometime - but I don't have the energy to do that on a forum such as this. I much prefer such conversation over a few beers or cups of coffee.
Thanks to all who have welcomed me on this board. It is encouraging to see just how many people are leaving the JWs. It gives me hope that maybe one day my Dad will leave and he'll know some real peace in his life.
-Ima
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20
The 2008 Grand Boasting Session Ahead
by WTWizard inwell, the time is almost here--already.
the first of the 2008 grand boasting sessions is almost upon us, and i expect to begin seeing threads about the programs in the coming weeks.
notably, this means some children will be missing the last weeks of school (the program starts on friday), or at least one day of it, to attend.. i will be looking for any new rules and instructions that have not yet happened.
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Ima Apostate
My, things have changed since I went to these! Bans on Myspace and Facebook! I'm not really suprised...
But bans on oral sex?
I'd rather die ;-)
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44
Hi I'm new here - a bit about me
by Fishbulb inwell where do i start?
i am 34, male and gay.
when i was about 15 i was exposed to the witnesses teachings.
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Ima Apostate
I hope you will find some comfort here. I'm sure you will make new 'worldly' friends soon. And believe me, worldly people are so much better friends than anyone in the Kingdom Hall.
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54
Finding Faith
by Ima Apostate inhow many of you ex-jw kids were able to believe in mainstream christianity after leaving the borg?
within the last year, i have opened up to getting to know god again.
what's funny is that when i prayed for truth and to know god, i knew and had a real feeling in my heart that i was getting closer to something real, but there was still a voice going, "hey, it's me jehovah, and you have rejected me!".
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Ima Apostate
BurntheShips,
I'm so glad you were able to find faith as well. Setting foot in an Episcopal church 9 months ago was the scariest thing I have ever done. I was so freaked out by everything - the huge cross, the font, the pastor in his weird outfit (oh my God - where is his suit and tie!! ;-), and the reading of the Psalms and especially the Creed. But when he preached a gospel that I have heard a million times in a completely new light, my heart broke. I literally had tears in my eyes. I realized I'd been dead wrong about scores of people for a long time. Don't get me wrong, I still have my reservations about Fundamentalist Southern Christians... But there is a whole world of believers out there who really have a good sense about what is really going on.
I understand not everyone wants a relationship with God or believes in him, and I'm not here to tell them what they need to do and what they need to believe. I just hope they keep an open mind as they move through life about the people who have managed to find faith in something beyond themselves.
-Ima
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54
Finding Faith
by Ima Apostate inhow many of you ex-jw kids were able to believe in mainstream christianity after leaving the borg?
within the last year, i have opened up to getting to know god again.
what's funny is that when i prayed for truth and to know god, i knew and had a real feeling in my heart that i was getting closer to something real, but there was still a voice going, "hey, it's me jehovah, and you have rejected me!".
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Ima Apostate
Wow. There certainly are some mixed views out there concerning this. Let me just say that I'm not suprised at all that so many people here are completely confused about God and don't see the point in trying to understand him. After all, he makes it pretty freakin' hard. You can't pick up the Bible, read it, and say, "Wow! I get it now!" And weird fundamentalist Christians don't make it any easier to find faith. (And sorry to anyone here who has simply stopped believing in God - you totally have that right - I was just never able to completely get rid of the idea that there might be something there.)
In my experience, I would say I was agnostic for years and years. And nothing happened in my life to make me seek out faith. Absolutely nothing. Life went on as it always has and it's been pretty freakin' good. If I am seeking faith for comfort, it is an unconscious desire.
But for some reason about 11 months ago, something led me to faith. I started looking, and praying on the scriptures that deal with "seek and you shall find". I also read a terrific book by Tom Wright called Simply Christian about this time, and it showed me that mainstream Christians don't necessarily believe all those doctrines that JWs taught me they did (like eternal hellfire, going up to the clouds of heaven to meet Jesus, etc).
Bottom line, I think something created us. And I think that something wants us to realize that it's about him, not us. I also believe that Yahweh in the old testament was loving AND forgiving. Do you know how many times he spared Israel, how many times they kept screwing up, and how many times he sought to forgive them? Yes God is wrathful at times, but I'm a parent, and my kids will tell you that I've been wrathful when I've been angry at what they've done. Jesus has revealed in the New Testament that above all, God is a god of love, and he wants us to love him and our fellow man.
I don't type this to tell you what to believe, this is simply what I've been able to wrap my insane brain around since coming out of JW brainwashing and then slowly drawn out of a long period of Agnosticism. You all believe what you want! I won't even claim that I'm right... It's just what I feel deeply and what makes sense to me after a careful study of the Bible and human history.
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watchtowers at my threrapist's office
by loosie inwhen i go to my threrapist's office, while waiting in the waiting room, i look for wts and awakes.
when i find them i write on them a website either this one or silent lambs or i just write "this group is a cult" across the front of it.. one visit i found like 12 wts.
i didn't have time to scribble a note on all of them before my therapist called me in.. well this week.
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Ima Apostate
Loosie, you are the coolest. You've inspired me to carry a Sharpie at all times.
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54
Finding Faith
by Ima Apostate inhow many of you ex-jw kids were able to believe in mainstream christianity after leaving the borg?
within the last year, i have opened up to getting to know god again.
what's funny is that when i prayed for truth and to know god, i knew and had a real feeling in my heart that i was getting closer to something real, but there was still a voice going, "hey, it's me jehovah, and you have rejected me!".
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Ima Apostate
How many of you ex-JW kids were able to believe in mainstream Christianity after leaving the Borg? Within the last year, I have opened up to getting to know God again. What's funny is that when I prayed for truth and to know God, I knew and had a real feeling in my heart that I was getting closer to something real, but there was still a voice going, "Hey, it's me Jehovah, and you have rejected me!"
Luckily, with a LOT of study of JW belief, mind control, the Bible, the Trinity, and Christian history, the voice is finally going away. It might even be gone. Anyone else have that voice for a while? How many of you have been able to say the Creed and believe it? I didn't say the Creed at church for months.
And oh my god, the first time I took communion, it was like heaven. I cried almost every day in the weeks leading up to my baptism.
Just wondering what you experiences are?
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51
I think I just need to tell the story to someone who will get it?
by aimless inhi everyone, im new.
i've been feeling a burden on myself for the years that i have been out and i just don't know how to ease it.
i can't talk about the organization or the people in it to anyone... if i try i immediately feel sick and want to close up and just disappear.
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Ima Apostate
And I agree about college. It teaches you HOW to think, not WHAT to think. It will open your mind and give you confidence.
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I think I just need to tell the story to someone who will get it?
by aimless inhi everyone, im new.
i've been feeling a burden on myself for the years that i have been out and i just don't know how to ease it.
i can't talk about the organization or the people in it to anyone... if i try i immediately feel sick and want to close up and just disappear.
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Ima Apostate
I get it, aimless. But I feel nothing but excited for your potential. All the energy and love that you poured into trying to be a perfect witness all those years, just think what you could do with it if you channeled it into something else? Search your heart and mind for your passion and go for it. You'd be suprised how much joy you can get out of your job when it is meaningful to you.
Plus, you've got a great guy. I ended up marrying my 'worldly' boyfriend and we've been married 10 years. A good relationship makes such a difference in your life.
It sounds like you have a real anxiety disorder. This can be easily fixed with anxiety medications. LOTS of people take them. If you have health insurance, I'd advise you to talk to your doctor and get some meds. I had this same type of anxiety when I was leaving the organization - severe fear that was completely irrational, feeling nauseous...
You hang in there. Get out of the job if it's driving you nuts. And appreciate what you have now. That determined little person you are is still in you and you can do amazing things if you find that passion again.
Plus, pray to God, the REAL god, to open your heart to the truth about him. At first, you might hear what you think is Jehovah going, "Hey, I already gave you the truth and your rejected me. Now you're going to DIE!". But that's just the brainwashing. That stupid little voice will get more and more faint the more you read the Bible and pray to know the truth. You know the Watchtower says that if a Witness stops reading Watchtowers and studies the Bible alone, within 3 years they will revert back to apostate teachings. Well, there's a reason for that, they're TRUE!
I wish you the best...